3.14 Cyborg Sam I Am
Chett is cleaning out his room to make way for a new Soloflex
machine. When Wyatt asks how he can afford such a pricey piece of
equipment, Chett replies that he sold Wyatt’s laser disc player.
And, he boasts, “In 30 days, I’ll be toned, tight and tasty.”
Chett hands over a box of old toys -- stuff he's stolen from
Wyatt over the years. Wyatt is excited to see all his "old
friends." One of the toys in the box is an action figure called Cyborg
Sam -- kind of a robot superhero. He was Wyatt’s favorite toy when he was eight.
Lisa brings Sam to life, along with several other toys in the
box. This includes a ratty old teddy bear that swigs beer and flirts
with Lisa and a bimbo Barbie doll that belonged to a cousin,
But Sam is noble and his role in life is to protect Wyatt. He even shows up at school to
save Wyatt from dodge ball. This embarrasses Wyatt and asks Sam to get lost. Sam pouts and leaves.
He returns later to find Chett wrestling with Wyatt. (The Teddy
Bear has wrecked the house, and all the empty beer bottles and pizza
boxes make it look like Wyatt had a wild party. Chett wants to make sure it stays that way so Wyatt will get in trouble.
So he's trying to wrestle him into submission and stop him from
cleaning up.) When Wyatt asks Sam for help, Sam acts hurt and offended, pointing out that Wyatt
said he doesn’t need help anymore. But then Sam hears Wyatt call
Chett by name and changes his mind. He wants revenge for Chett sticking a firecracker in his
"rear storage compartment." (There’s a flashback to this
scene, complete with Chett's bad teen wig.)
Chett taunts Sam. “What’s up with the outfit, Sparky? Looking for the Star Trek convention? Look like you took a wrong turn at Uranus.”
Sam aims his action-hero ray gun at Chett, and Chett aims his
paint-ball gun at Sam. Wyatt intervenes and suggests they duke it
out instead. They go outside to use the life-size Rock’em Sock’em robots.
Chett cheats and distracts Sam, getting in a few good punches. Sam won’t cheat because he has the Wyatt Donnelly code of justice ingrained in him. Chett taunts him again, “Pull that tin out of your crack and let’s rumble.” In the end, Sam wins and
knocks Chett's block off.
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