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Weird Science

2.2 Rock Hard Chett

Chett's trying to sunbathe, but the guys keep turning on the rain, with the aid of a weather gizmo Lisa made. "Torturing Chett brings out the artist in me," she beams. Little sunshowers aren't enough, though, so Gary turns up the intensity. When the gizmo gets stuck on "lightning barrage," the boys fear for Chett's life. They beg for Lisa to intervene, so she turns him invincible, like the hero in the comic book he was reading.

Chett climbs out of the hole he was zapped into by the lightning and sputters out: "I think that's enough sun for one day."

The next day, he’s out jogging when a robber steals an armored car. The truck hits Chett but doesn’t kill him. Then the guy tries to shoot him and Chett is fine. He pulls a bullet out of his bellybutton. He's a little spooked about what's happening.

He goes home and hits himself with a crow bar. Nothing. He smashes some bottles and glasses against his head. No damage.

Chett turns to listen to a radio report about the lone hero who thwarted a robbery attempt. “Me? A hero?" Chett flexes. "Outstanding!”

He comes in dress uniform and tells the boys he’s going to tell everyone his secret so he can get rewarded. The guys convince him that superheroes always have a secret identity and end up getting more recognition and fame that way. Chett agrees to create an alter ego. 

After much thinking, he comes up with the name – Star Spangled Butt Kicker ("I know it's a mouthful, but I like it") He dons a red, white and blue costume, and the letters BK adorn his chest. (Foreshadowing for "Oz"?)

He’s so wrapped up in doing good deeds, saving people, talking to schoolchildren that he forgets to pick on Wyatt, much to Wyatt’s relief. 

One day, he comes home with pizza. "Some hoodlum put a cherry bomb down a toilet at the pizza place. I was in a position to smother it, so the owner gave me a free pie."

But when Chett burns himself on the pizza, the boys realize that the spell has worn off, so they follow him to the bank, where he’s going to stop a hold-up and hostage situation. They’re all dressed a SWAT team members. Wyatt and Gary tried to convince him that his powers are gone, but he thinks Wyatt is jealous. He goes in and gets shot. As he’s dying he calls Wyatt close and says, “Don’t touch my stuff.” Then he burps and dies. Lisa is able to bring him back to life, but her strength is zapped.

Chett revives and sees Lisa lying unconscious, prompting him to ask, “What happened to Captain Finger-Licking Good?” 

He’s still not convinced he lost his powers so Wyatt hits him and it hurts. Despite the loss of his invincibility, Chett decides he needs to go back into the bank because people are counting on him. He goes in and tricks the robbers and then takes their guns. Wyatt tells Chett he’s proud of him and Wyatt moves in for a hug. Chett says, “If you hug me, I’ll gut ya.” 

Chett is back!

Back to Weird Science episode list

Episode Gallery

Trying to sunbathe
Testing invincibility

Man in uniform
Star-Spangled eyes
 Star-Spangled pose
Disarming bad guys

The Chett Quotient:

Chett Guh Factor: 8
Chett Intensity: 9
Chett Humor: 9